It has been a Sad Day

Before I can tell you why I am sad, I have to give you all a bit of information. Back in the summer of 2010 a young lady named Hope posted that she needed someone to take care of her cat while she lived in a dorm in college. She was not living at home and no one in her family wanted to help out. I saw a picture of the cat and knew we had to help her. This cat, named Whisky, looked just like our precious Ridgeway who had died in 2008. I emailed her and we spoke on the phone. We met in person and got to meet Whisky. Now Whisky had a temperment, but could be sweet. We agreed she would bring us Whisky in August and she would give me $40 a month towards food and litter.

We took Whisky in and it took almost two months to get used to us. She finally decided to make Jacob's room her room and stayed in their 99.9% of the time, only venturing out every once in a while. Jacob and Whisky were quite close and he was the only one who could pick her up. I would send Hope updates about Whisky and send her pictures and movies too. We kept in touch and pretty soon it was May 2001 and she came to get Whisky.

We kept in touch through Facebook. I followed how she was doing in college and she would post pictures of Whisky. Jacob had been really sad to see Whisky leave, but he was glad she was happy with Hope. Hope recently posted a picture of Whisky that made us all laugh and I had written her about Whisky.

Last night, when I signed onto Facebook I saw Hope had posted on her Wall. Well, I started reading and I couldn't believe what I was reading. It stated that Hope had been killed in a car wreck on Saturday. I went straight to her Wall and started reading all of the posts. There were no words to express how sad I was. She was only 19 years old. I finally got some more details, and found out she was not wearing a seat belt. She was the passenger in a car that the driver lost control of and they hit another car carrying two people. The three other people survived, but one had to be care flighted to a hospital. I have no idea what their condition is.

I told Jacob the story today. He gasped when I told him that she was not wearing a seatbelt. We had a long talk. Jacob is 15 years old and will be driving within a year. I don't judge Hope for not wearing her seatbelt, but her tragic death affects so many. What if she had only worn that seat belt? What if? We will never know. This has bothered me so much today. Maybe, it is because Jacob is only four years younger than her. Maybe it is because she was just so young. I just know that I am sad and I am sad for her family. It gives me perspective and reminds me that I need to live every day to the fullest.

Jacob's Socks

Every week I wash the boys'clothes. We are being ecofriendly and using a clothesline to dry our clothes. I have noticed that most weeks Jacob has very little underwear and socks to hang up. I guess he doesn't believe in changing either very often. Well, this week he had only ONE pair of socks in his laundry. I mentioned it to him and he said that Elijah must be taking his socks. Well, let's just say that Jacob's socks don't fit Elijah's feet. My conclusion is that they never end up in Jacob's laundry basket.

I folded laundry today and Jacob finally decided to search his room for socks. He then told me in a very annoying manner that he didn't know where his socks were with a look accusing ME of losing his socks. You would just have to be there to get it, but imagine a teenage boy and how they talk sometimes. I then go and search his room and find two pairs of socks....one clean pair and one dirty pair. I then find a LOT of trash and a few white t-shirts. I then made him clean up his room and told him it was real simple....walk the TWO steps it takes to go from his bed to his laundry basket and HIS socks wouldn't get lost. They don't get lost going from his room to the washing machine. They just never make it to the laudnry basket.

Jacob cleaned his room and took his trash out to the big trash can outside. He was very polite and I think he realized he needs to be a little more respectful and that pushing MY buttons just makes his life a little harder! I love him dearly, he is my heart, but there are times he needs to think before he speaks.

Too cool!

Elijah and I were driving around last weekend and I was listening to music from my Iphone plugged into the car stereo system. A song started, and I wanted to listen to the next song so I skipped it. The song had just started and we had heard the first few beats of it before I skipped to the next one. Elijah immediately said, "mom I want to listen to Dynamite." He had heard just the first few beats of the song and recognized it. I was so surprised, and of course, I went back to that song and we listened to it. He sang along with it and we had a great time. He has asked for that song a few more times when we drive! It amazes me what he can do with the hearing he has from his CI processors.

Another funny story is how he has selective listening. I can say his name several times from the kitchen while he is in the den and he doesn't answer. However, if we leave the refrigerator door open and it starts beeping he will yell at me from the den to close it. He even hears it over a Wii game he is playing or just the TV being on. He can also recognize TV commercials and some that are his favorites, especially anything with cats!

Elijah heard for the first time on October 22, 2001 and for the second ear on January 20, 2005. He has been hearing for 10 of his 11 1/2 years. You would think that I would still be used to him being able to hear and what he can do, but there are times when I am still amazed. Maybe it is because I work with deaf and hard of hearing kids on a daily basis and I wish they could do more with the hearing they had. I wish they didn't have to struggle so much. Elijah is still behind in his language skills, but he is so much farther along then some other kids I work with.



He has always worn stickers on his processors, but this week we put on blue microphone covers with some blue star stickers. Here is the picture. I think he looks cute. The picture at the top was taken last year when we stopped at a Steak and Shake to eat. I thought it was another cute picture. I sure wish he could have the Nucleus 5 processor, but his Freedoms work just fine and he can HEAR!

September 11, 2001

It has been a day of remembrance for me. I was a teacher at the high school in the district I work in, when a teacher in the hallway told me about the World Trade Center. I then heard a bit later that another plane hit the other tower. One of the interpreters had a radio and she pulled it out so we could listen to it. I called my husband who was just as afraid as I was. I knew my mother was traveling that day from somewhere in the north east, but wasn't sure where. I finally got a hold of someone at her company who called her so she could call me. Someone finally brought in a video from home and everyone int he school watched in horror.

It was very difficult for all of us and I remember trying to explain it to my students using sign language. I videoed the news coverage at home for the next week or so bringing it in for my students to watch. They would work and then ask me to explain what was happening in the video. Much of the coverage was not captioned so they had no idea what was going on.

There was one shining moment on that day. I got a call from the caseworker handling Elijah's cochlear implant surgery. It had been approved and the doctor's office should be calling to set up his surgery. He was 17 months old at the time and we had been awaiting this moment for several weeks. He had his surgery on Sept. 26, 2001.

It was a day of mixed emotions for me. I was elated about Elijah's surgery but devastated by the events of the day. I also remember how patriotic my deaf young men were in my class. They were determined to join the military and help. They knew they couldn't be on the front line, but they could drive a truck or be a mechanic. It broke my heart to tell them that they would not be allowed to join, but that I was so proud of them for wanting too.

Update--Third week of School

So I get a phone call from the assistant principal of Elijah's school today. He bit a student in art class. I mention to her that biting has been one of his tics in the past. He has put his mouth/teeth on a doorknob, on my arm or hand and on many other things. He does it when he is frustrated. Last week he spit at someone at lunch. Again, this is one of his tics. I can hear the air leave the room when I speak to the assistant principal on the phone. She really doesn't "get it". Now, I don't want him doing these things, but we all have to work with him on finding a replacement tic.

Thankfully, I also got a call from the LSSP(school psychologist) last week and I absolutely love her. We had talked about the spitting incident and she spoke to the school about it being a tic. She did a training at the school this past Wednesday. I called her this afternoon and we talked about the biting incident. She then told me she had biting listed as a possible tic for kids with Tourette's. She assured me she would go to the school and speak to them again.

Now, Elijah and I talked about the spitting when it happened and again today about the biting. The school and I need to work with him on finding a replacement tic and looking for what precedes these incidents so we can try to keep this from happening. What drives me crazy is the feeling that they don't realy believe these are tics. I don't want to be seen as the mom who makes excuses for her son so he can misbehave.

I told someone one the phone just now, what I want is for more understanding on their part. For them to examine the situation and not always assume some action couldn't be a tic, but rather examine the situation and determine if it might be a tic. Elijah is pretty honest about his tics and if it isn't a tic he will tell you. The only thing keeping me from being really aggravated with the school is knwoing the LSSP understands and she will step in and work with the school staff to help Elijah and help them to understand Tourette's. It really is a hard one to wrap your brain around.

Vocabulary, Ipads and Cartoons

Elijah still amazes me daily with the vocabulary he uses. I have got to be a better recorder and start writing down some of what he says. He loves POKEMON right now(drives Jacob and I crazy with it) and is always wanting us to watch it. He will say things like, "look mom, that pokemon is EVOLVING!" He then tells me all the names of the Pokemon animals...is that what they are? He also tells me about the story. He will then tell me that the people are evacuating. I am just amazed that he can relate all of this to me in a coherent way that I understand, or think I understand. I am not a big Pokemon fan.




Elijah also loves my IPad. I use it as a reward for good behavior at school. His teachers do email me if he had a rough day, and he doesn't like losing his time with the Ipad. He likes watching videos on youtube or playing angry birds. He will bring me the Ipad and tell me all kinds of things about what he is doing. He told me today about some "creepers" in a game he was playing. He is also very good with the Ipad and doesn't get frustrated with it like he does the computer.

I almost forgot to tell y'all this cute story. Elijah called me on my cell phone the other day and I could not answer. He then called me again and left me a message. It went something like this, "mom are you there........mom are you there...I so worried, I call you back in a minute." Isn't that the cutest thing?!

I know it may not seem like a big deal, but the fact that he learns new vocabulary daily, with little intervention from me is amazing to me. I work with so many deaf students who just aren't at this level. Elijah's speech may not always be great, but the words he uses astound me. I'll have to start keeping a list of his words and update y'all later.

Update on boys and school!

Well both boys have been back to school for two weeks now. Jacob got his ROTC uniform switched out for a bit larger size so he is set and ready to wear it when the time comes. We went to Meet the Teacher the other night and I got to meet most of his teachers. They spoke well of him and so far he is doing well in school. He is a sophomore this year and is having to shave a few times a week!

Elijah is in 5th grade and attending an intermediate school. He was in the behavior program for the last two and a half years at the elementary school. Needless to say this is a HUGE change for him. He is riding the bus to and from school. An aide meets him and several other kids at the school and they wait in the library for school to start. He has two resource classes(English and Math) and is in inclusion for Science and Social Studies. He has had a few behavior challenges. The teachers have been great at communicating with me as have both of the principals.

He did spit at several kids at lunch the other day. The assistant principal called and when I told her it was a tic, I could her the disbelief in her voice. We talked and then when I arrived home I emailed the principal. The school LSSP(psychologist) happened to call the next day and we spoke for quite some time. She agreed that the spitting was a tic and she would talk to both principals the next day. She asked lots of good questions and will be leading a workshop for Elijah's teachers next week. The LSSP asked me what I really wanted the teachers to get out of this workshop and I told her that Tourette's is not just about tics, it has many co morbid disorders. We also discussed how Elijah's hearing loss affects his communication in regards to his tourette's syndrome. Elijah is a good communicator but not great at explaining how his tics affect him.

I have to say though, that overall I am pleased with how the school year has started. I am sure there will be some issues during this school year, but hopefully we can all work together to ensure that Elijah has a good year!