ARGHHHHH

Elijah and I went out to lunch at Chick-fil-a today to meet a former teacher of his. Elijah had gone into the play area and after a few minutes I noticed him doing one of his tics. He was making faces at a boy and moving his head from side to side and back and forth. It looks intentional, but it really is a tic. I walked in and the mom of the boy was in there, eating a salad, and I told her about the tics. She said, "Oh ok, good to know he is just not making faces." I also mentioned he had impulsivity issues.

The friend had arrived by then and we had both gotten our food. I was just getting ready to get Eiljah when I notice this same mom now chastising Elijah about something. I walk in to her yelling at him for pushing her son. Now, I am not excusing Elijah for pushing, in no way, but she knew I was his mom and could have come to get me. Most of the time, in my experience, parents usually come and talk to another parent and don't handle things on their own. Yelling at Elijah just doesn't work, it makes him even more defiant. I calmly said, "Elijah you should not have pushed the boy. Now come with me and we will go and eat. You can't play if you are going to act this way." Before I could walk towards him he yells, "NO" and then proceeds to quickly turn his head and do a raspberry in my direction. Well becasue this other mom was standing so close to him AND had food in her hand, this spit went in her direction and landed in her salad. She then starts yelling, "HE SPIT IN MY SALAD." Of course, I am dying a thousand deaths and I went towards Eiljah to just get him out of there. I really didn't know what to do. This woman is yelling at the top of her lungs and her yelling is what had agitated him in the first place. AGAIN, not excusing Elijah's behavior, but this mom was very aware of who I was and could have come to get me. She yells again, "HE spit in my salad, are you going to buy me a new one?" Well, I was trying not to get pissed. I wanted to yell at her, "why didn't you come get me? why did you try to handle this yourself? most parents DON'T bring food into the play area." Instead I just said, "Well you shouldn't have brought food in here."

I get Elijah and we leave to go and eat. She comes out and again yells, "HE spit in my food." I just sit down and ignore her. I explain to the person with us what happend. I really didn't know what to do and thankfully this other mom just stayed away from us. I kept Elijah out of the play area even after he had finished eating. I also told him he had lost the computer for the rest of the day for his behavior...pushing the boy and the raspberry. The mom and her kids left and after a little bit I let him go back in and play. He had no other issues with any kids and did fine in there.

I later thought, maybe I should have bought her a new salad. I don't know. Did I handle this correctly? I could have gone the other way too and just yelled right back at her. I don't know if y'all remember the blog that I posted a while back about the boy that Elijah threw a shoe at when we had visited another Chikc-fil-a. Elijah apologized and the boy had said, "No harm done." He even said, "He is a good boy" pointing to Elijah. He even asked me about Elijah's implants and how they worked. This little boy, who was maybe seven or eight years old, handled things with Elijah a whole lot better than this mom did. Another time, I had seen a mom looking out into the dining area with my niece. I went in and said, "Is my boy behaving?" The mom said, "Well, he is just being a little aggressive." I got Elijah down and took him out. I explained to the woman about his Tourettes and told her thank you for bringing it to my attention. Elijah did a time out, then ate, and then went back to play. I have never chastised another person's child in a restaurant. I have said things like, "OH be careful when you run, you might fall," or "lets slow down a little." Even if I saw a child being mean, I would start looking for their parent to mention it to them. I think that is what bothered me the most. This mom knew who I was. I had already been in and talked to her about Elijah. Obviously she knew I was watching, because I saw him doing tics and went in to explain. All she had to do was come and get me. Elijah does "spit" as a tic at times, but usually with no saliva. this was the first time he had done an all out raspberry.

I still question if I did the right thing. Probably not, and maybe I'll handle it differently next time. I am not going to stay home and avoid the public though. Elijah doesn't deserve to be "kept home" because of his condition. He does need to learn to control himself and learn how to handle himself. He is only ten though and this is a lot for any person, nevertheless a child, to handle.

The Dirty Truth from Dirty Jobs

I watched Dirty Jobs the other night on the Discovery Channel. It was an episode where the host, Mike Rowe, reminisces about the 250 dirty jobs he has undertaken. What I write here are some things he stated in the show that really seemed profound to me about working a job.

1. Work smart AND hard. You need both of these to keep a job and/or find a job.

2. Don't follow your passion, bring it with you. Don't make happiness or passion a condition of your employment. Passion should be something you bring with you.

3. Stay in school, but not too long.

4. Make a date to imitate. Meaning you can learn a lot from watching others. He showed a lot of manual jobs where people watched others and learned from watching them.

5. Efficieny is for robots, be effective. I really like this one also.

6. Beware of experts. Just because an expert says it is the best way to do something, doesn't mean it always is.

I went to the Dirty Jobs website and found some clips from the show. I tried putting them in here, but I can never make it work as a link. You can cut and paste them if you like!

http://dsc.discovery.com/videos/dirty-jobs-the-passion-of-mike.html

http://dsc.discovery.com/tv/dirty-jobs

http://dsc.discovery.com/videos/dirty-jobs/

Summer!

Today was really our first full week day home for the summer. We left right away for our vacation to the beach on my last day at work on June 4th. Elijah and I slept in to about 9:00 which was nice. He had pancakes for breakfast and I ate my bagel! He played on the computer and later the Wii while I read a book and did a few things around the house.

We later went to the post office and picked up a weeks worth of mail. Not much in there, except a few bills...ugh! Jacob slept to about 11:00 and then I got him up. We have to go to two doctor's appointments on Thursday and he has to go with me, because one of them is for him, so I need him to start trying to wake up at a semi-decent hour. Of course, he says he is a teen and teens are supposed to sleep! ha! On Thursday I plan on going to one appointment, then taking the boys to a movie and then going to our second appointment. Both are in the same area and about 40 min away, so we are not driving home!

Elijah and I went to the library today. He picked out five books. I had gone to the fiction section and found four books by two authors I have just discovered. It was nice to walk into the children's section and find him sitting at a table flipping through a book. He had several picked out already.

We had a lazy afternoon at home and a nice dinner. I just came back from blockbuster with some ice cream from Sonic to surprise the boys. We all enjoyed it.

Tiger, our black tabby, is sleeping next to me and I am sure Perky is back in Jacob's room with him. Oreo could be anywhere! All three cats have been quite loving the last few days since we came home. I think they really missed us.

I may go into work for a few hours tomorrow, but nothing major. I have a three day conference to attend in July and a two day workshop in August. Other than that the summer is MINE, and the boys too, of course. We have my dad's pool we can visit. Oh and we are going to have Elijah's kid birthday party in July(birthday was in April, but he wanted a swim party so we pushed the party to the summer) and Jacob's actual bithday is in July! It will be a busy month when it comes to birthdays!

Hope everyone else is having a great summer break so far!

Traveling with Tourettes

Our trip to Orange Beach for five days went very well. Elijah did a great job playing with other kids in the pool and had a great time riding the waves. My mom, Jacob, Elijah and I started for home around 9:30 yesterday morning. We stopped in Hattiesburg, Mississippi to eat lunch at the Cracker Barrel.

Elijah had had very few tics while on our trip, but boy was he having tics on the way home and in the restaurant. I think he was stressed some about leaving the beach and wanting to get home to see our kitties. He was snorting, clearing his throat, and banging the table. I just rubbed his back and told him it was OK. It doesn't bother me and I wanted him to know it was OK to have his tics.

We had a nice waitress who did a great job waiting on us. She happened to walk up when Elijah had a series of tics. He was quite loud. My mom mentioned that he had tourettes and those were his tics. I usually don't bother to say anything unless someone asks. Well the waitress says, "Well he is just a special boy and y'all are special for taking him out like this to eat." I held my tongue. I wanted to say...."well are we supposed to keep him locked up at home and never take him out." I didn't though. I don't think she meant anything by it. I think she just didn't know what to say and said that. Elijah also has his cochlear implants that he wears and those are hard to miss, so most people know he is "special" for some reason or another.

I have though of making up a business card and explaining his cochlear implants on one card and on a different card his tourtte syndrome. When people look, I can just have him hand them a card depending on why they are looking/staring at him....because of the cochlear implant processors or because of the tics.

Our Vacation at Orange Beach June 2010

Jacob, Elijah and I left for my mother's house on Friday afternoon. She lives in Marshall, TX. We stayed the night and then left for Mobile on Saturday morning. We arrived in Mobile and got checked into our hotel. We then went to my grandma Ruby's house. I have not seen her in two years and was looking forward to seeing her. She had hip replacement surgery about six weeks ago and was still recovering. Several of my aunts, uncles and cousins came over that evening. Grandma Ruby surprised all of her great grandsons with a joint birthday cake and cards!



This is a video from that evening.

A little bit of chaos, but fun! We crashed hard that night at a hotel and got up the next morning to Krispy Kreme donuts! We then went for another short visit with my grandmother and then headed to Orange Beach!

We have had a great time so far and got two and half days of NO oil and were able to swim. Elijah has NO fear at all went way out into the water with his boogey board. He loved riding the waves in. If he flipped off of the board he just got right back on it and tried again. I have learned to let go a bit and let him have his freedom but also keeping an eye on him. I don't want him drifting too far down the beach with the current pulling him down. He did well though and kept an eye on me too. Now Jacob only made two short vists to the beach. It really isn't his thing. He did spend a lot of time at the pool. My nephew Trent was quite brave and went out in the water quite a few times. He and Elijah have had a good time together!!

There is a video of a sand castle that Elijah and I built today at the end of this blog entry. He is wearing his backup "ears". Oh I have really liked having two sets of ears for him. He wears his new gray "ears" most of the time, but when we go to the beach he wears his back up beige "ears" that have the earmolds. We didn't go in the water today due to the arrival of the oil so he kept them on while we built the sandcastle. The other night we took him and Trent down at night. It was so nice to see him playing at the edge of the water with his ears on. He was able to communicate with his cousin quite well and enjoyed hearing the sounds of the waves! Elijah has still had his tics, but they haven't been that awful. His cousin Trent tried to tell us one of his mad faces was a tic. It was sort of cute. Overall, he has done well. A few spats with his cousin, but typical BOY stuff!

I think Elijah has enjoyed the beach the most. I have really enjoyed it myself. There is something about making a sandcastle and having NO other worries while you are building it. Listening to the waves with the wind off the water keeping you cool. It is so theraputic. I also rode the waves with Elijah and felt like a KID again! My legs let me know the next morning that I wasn't still a kid, but I did it again that day anyway! We have had crab claws for three nights. My mom cooked for two of those nights. OH they were so GOOD! She is such a good cook. We went souvenier shopping today and I got t-shirts for the boys and myself. Tomorrow we are going to go and see my Aunt Peggy! It should be a nice visit. We will swim some more and probably make one more walk down to the beach. We leave for Marshall on Friday morning. We will spend the night with my mom and be home on Saturday. It has been a great trip so far, but there is no place like home. Elijah is missing his kitties and I think Jacob is too!

Elijah's and the Sinking Titanic

Elijah surprises me more and more each day with what he knows. Before I tell this story I have to explaing the game we play on the way to school. My mother was spending the night one night with us and teased Elijah saying he would have to sleep in the attic. He then came back with,"grandma has to sleep in the fireplace." They went on and on for a while coming up with strange places to sleep. Elijah loves this game and I use it as a tool to teach vocabulary and also to ask WHY a place may not be a good place to sleep.

About a week ago, he started this game with me in the car on the way to school. We went back and forth a few times and then he told me, "MOM you will sleep in the sinking Titanic." I was impressed he knew what the Titanic was. He then said, "You will sleep in the bow." Ok now I am really impressed and said, "THE bow, really?" He came back with, "No you sleep in the stern." Well I knew one of these was the front of the boat and the other the back, not sure which was which(I looked it up later), but I was impressed he just new the terms. I emailed his teacher later and she wrote back taht he loved to read a book about the Titanic that she had and that he loved looking at a picture of the ship with the different parts labeled.

So today, he starts with the game again and tells me again I will sleep in the sinking Titanic. He then tells me I will sleep in the cabin in the birge. I said, "The birge, don't you mean the bilge(his /l/ is not always the greatest." He argued with me about how to say it and I just said whatever, because I wasn't sure I was even right. I did look it up later though, and it is the bilge! Again, quite impressed. He then said, "Mom, the first class has a lot of money. The second class has a little money and the third class is at the bottom." I am sure he meant at the bottom of the ship, where the third class cabins were. WOW! All of this from reading a book.

He is a smart little guy, who isn't so little anymore. Today was his last day as a third grader! He is now officially a fourth grader and summer has begun!

New Ears!!!

Today Elijah and I drove down to the audiologist's office and pick up his new silver Freedom Cochlear Implant processors. It was like gettin an early Christmas! The secretary handed me two brown boxes full of equipment. We got everything that you get with a new kit. Each processor came with an extra controller(we didn't get that when we upgraded in 2006), two coils,two rechargeable batteries and charger, as well as a case for each processor and some other odds and ends.



I let Elijah choose his color this time and he chose the silver. The other choices were black, beige, brown, pink and blue. I was really surprised he didn't get the blue ones! I decided I would keep the eargear on his beige processors, that are now his backup processors, to use for soccer and also for when we go down to the beach for our vacation. I'll take all four processors and use the beige ones for the beach and pool, but he still won't wear them in the water. I need to order two snugfits and might even get him some different colored mic covers and also stickers to decorate them with.

He was very cute when we were in the office. I put one of them on and he liked it. I then assembled the second one. The audiologist had programmed them for, but had not put the whole processor together. I didn't make an appointment to pick them up because she just loaded the MAPs and let me pick them up. She knew we didn't want to wait to get them. I put the second processor on him and he looked at me and said, "Mom, we going to take these home, right?" I told him, "OH yes!"

We got home around 4:15 and I went through everything. I basically cleaned out one box and loaded up his body worn processors in them. I found the return paperwork and I decided to run them to the local office supply place which fedex picks up from so I could get them on their way! I came home and went through all of the body worn processor cords and such to get rid of them. I then organized all of the new equipment and put the beige processor equipment in one area. I am OCD that way!

Tomorrow is the last day of school and Elijah will get to wear his new EARS! I like the sliver, it goes good with his red hair!