Playing with Others

Today I my niece Tabitha came over to stay with us for the day. Usually, Elijah can be a bit bossy with her and not interact well with her. I really enjoy having Tabitha come over because she makes a very good playmate for Elijah. She is a bit younger, but maturity wise Elijah is more at her age level. They did great together today.

We went to Walmart so I could do my grocery shopping. At one point Tabitha said, "I found 250,000 eggs yesterday!" I said, "250,000??". Elijah started lauging and he said, "No one million!" Well they both started going back and forth with, "I am going to pay you back 2 billion dollars," and the other would reply "No, I am going to pay you back $1,000." They went back and forth like this the whole time we shopped. Elijah would start running, she would follow and of course I would say "stop running" and they both stopped and would come back! Elijah got to act like a big brother instead of being the "baby" of the family. He was so polite and sweet with her. Of course, she is always sweet!

We came home, ate some lunch and the dyed some eggs. Again, they did great together. Neither of them were bossy, and they used very polite words when dying and decorating the eggs. Later they shared and played with toys. Tabitha asked if she could have a turn and Elijah said yes and let her have a toy.

I have seen so much growth in Elijah in the last few months. There is still a lot of work ahead for him, but he has come so far. My sister-in-law thanked me for keeping Tabitha today, but it was a joy for me for so many reasons. I also got to play with Tabitha, we did the Wii fit!!!

My Niece

I always wanted one boy and one girl when we were considering having children. However, I got two boys and couldn't be happier. I am a tomboy at heart and if I had had a little girl, she would probably NOT be a tomboy. I do get to borrow my niece from time to time. Her name is Tabitha and she is six years old....soon to be seven in July! She is definitely all girl and wears pink any time she can. She and I had a great time making cookies over Christmas Break. Today, she and Elijah will dye eggs for Easter. It should be a lot of fun!

She will have a little brother come the Fall and she will be the only girl when it comes to all of the cousins. She gets to remain the princess of the group!I am sitting here watching her do the Wii fit and she is too cute!

If I couldn't have a girl of my own, at least I get to borrow one and have her to myself for a day or so!

Roller Coaster of Meds

Elijah is back on the rollercoaster of medicine. We went and saw the psych today and she wants to lower his seroquel. Two reasons: 1)He has gained a lot of weight and this med makes him hungry. The risperdal does too, but that med is actually helping with tics 2) He is on the highest dosage of seroquel for his age and if it isn’t helping with tics then we need to lower it.

The only downfall is we don’t know how much the seroquel is helping right now. The risperdal has helped with tics but does the seroquel work with this new med and how will things change when we lower it. He will take half of his usual dose in the morning and at lunch. At least he is home for the next three days.

I have emailed his teacher so she is aware of the change and informed her it may affect his behaviors. We may have to ride it out until his body gets used to this change, because we really don’t want him putting on all of this weight. He is also severely constipated. Even if he is not hungry the risperdal and seroquel make him THINK he is hungry. He is on a OTC med now to help with the constipation.

I just wish I had a crystal ball so I could see how this change in meds would affect him. It can just send him for such a loop and many people don’t get how this change can affect him and HOW IT REALLY ISN’T HIS FAULT WHEN IT DOES AFFECT HIM. He can’t help it! All I can do is keep educating people!

Learning to Listen

I am not talking about Elijah and his "ears" today. The person who has had to learn to listen in the last few months has been me. One thing I have had to learn about myself is that sometimes I am so busy trying to say what I need to say that I don't listen well enough. Sometimes LESS is MORE when you are trying to get your point across. This is somethings I have known for a long time and something I have really had to work on in the last few months. I have OCD myself and I don't know if it is that or just my personality, but sometimes I just NEED to shut my mouth and listen.

I also think I have become more aware of it now that I am the director of the deaf ed. program that I work in. I am the boss now, and I have to set the example of how to listen and how to jump in and help out. Sometimes even if you are right about something, you can lose the battle because of how you present your case.

I think this is something about myself that I will always need to be aware of and continue to work on. It has gotten easier to tell myself to "be quiet", but there are times when I think my OCD kicks in and I just can't shut up no matter how hard I try. Those are the times I really have got to see myself and just shut up. I guess I am on the right track....acknowledging the problem is the first step, right?

Parenting Decisions

Having a child means having to make decisions. Some decisions are easier than others. The first big decision is picking out a name for that new baby, or it may be even deciding TO get pregnant! Jacob was an easy child. There weren't a lot of "hard" decisions to be made with him. I decided to breast feed, we picked out a sitter, what kind of formula and so on. As Jacob has gotten older there have been harder decisions. One of the hardest things I did was let him go on an overnight trip at school. He did great, of course, but I was a basket case. He was in 5th grade and a mature kid, but OH it was hard. There will be more decisions ahead...letting him take the car for his first solo drive after getting his license, trusting him to make good choices when he is off with his friends, and later allowing him to leave home to go to college or just live on his own and work. Of course, he may choose to stay here a while! Ha!

There were a lot more decisions to be made for Elijah: To implant him or not when we found out he was deaf. Choosing doctors for all of his issues. Choosing a school when he was THREE and then letting him ride a bus to and from school at this time too. Choosing to put him in a behavior classroom due to his behavior with tourettes, OCD and ADHD. Again, there are more and more decisions that will have to be made as Elijah gets older. I think the hardest thing will be "growing him up" meaning letting go of my baby and expecting more from him. I have done that to a certain extent, but it will only get harder as he gets older.

I guess I now know why my mom worried so much about me, but she let me make my decisions as I grew up and learn from my mistakes. I hope I can do the same for my own kids.

Our cats

I haven't written about our kitties in a while, so I thought I would do that tonight. I need a distraction from tics!

Tiger, our black tabby, is doing well. He got sick about six weeks ago, but after a trip to the vet and some antibiotics he is doing well. He did hurt his foot the week before spring break and we had to go back to the vet. He had scraped up his paw pads pretty bad. He got to go with us on a trip to my mom's house. Thankfully he is a pretty laid back cat and did well on the drive there. He even ventured out and walked around her house and explored. I slept with him every night in one of her spare rooms and boy did he lay the love on me. I think he was afraid I would leave him there!

Perky is our white cat with some black fur, but more white than black. She was sick before Tiger got sick. Oh my vet bill is higher than I would like it to be. She is my only female companion in this house. She is laying next to me as I type and enjoying it when I pet her. She doesn't like to be held much, and we enjoy annoying her and making her "yodel". If you don't know what this is, go to youtube and search for cat yodeling. She has the best hearing. If I even raise the blinds in Elijah's room she is the first cat in the room to look out the window.

Oreo is our tuxedo cat who is black with some white. His name is Oreo because he is black with a white middle! We got him back in December and he is our baby kitten. It took a while for Perky and Tiger to accept him, but they are a wild bunch now. Oreo loves to have his stomack rubbed and he will let us hold him for a long time. He gets a little freaked when new people come over, but he was abandoned as a kitten and found under a house. I don't blame him for being skittish. He was uneasy with us for a whlie, but now les us scoop him up and carrying him around.

Jacob is our "cat whisperer". He loves to pick up one of the cats and just roll with him or her. They usually all sleep with him at night. Elijah loves the cats also, and he is very sweet with them. It helps with his behavior to have the cats.

We do love our kitties. Perky is still next to me, Oreo is asleep in a bing bag chair and Tiger just came in to see us! Now if they would only clean the house during the day when I am at work! Ha!

Looking Back

I was talking to a mom today of a child with a hearing loss. We were discussing cohclear implants and the choices that lay ahead for this family. After getting off the phone I started thinking of how far Elijah has come.

When I brought him home from the hospital he weighted five pounds nine ounces and needed oxygen. He was born eight weeks premature and was very sick for several weeks. He is now 4 ft. 2 inches tall and weighes 75 pounds. His lungs were weak for a long time, but he is very healthy now. He still sees a pulmanologist though and takes meds for his asthma. He failed his newborn hearing screening five weeks after his birth when he was being discharged from the hospital. He didn't even start talking until he was almost three years old, but did have signs prior to that. He was four before he was talking well. He now talks all the time and I wish I could have some peace and quiet. The day I brought him home, I was so overwhelmed by this small baby and now it seems like time has passed so quickly. We have new challenges with his tourette syndrome, OCD, ADHD and anxiety but I believe we are on a good path right now.

Jacob has changed so much in the last year too. He is now taller than me standing 5 foot 6 inches tall. He has this thick red hair that is just gorgeous and has the teen attitude too. He was sometimes the forgotten child, because his younger brother took up so much of my time. I think he has turned out OK though. I wish I could rewind time though and change a few things with him, but I'll just have to do my best right now with him.

I just remind myself that life is a journey and you never know where it may take you!